The Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders Woke Me Up

I was flipping the channels on TV the other night and happened upon another reality TV show. This show documented the long process of choosing the 2007-2008 cheerleading squad for the Dallas Cowboy’s football team. This episode was their charm school portion of training. Beautiful young ladies were caught with less than perfect manners from biting off more than they can chew to many other lazy eating habits that we all so easily fall into—especially when we’ve been away from dating for a while.

Okay, even I was humbled! I’ve been comfortably married for 10 years now and my manners are not as perfect as they were when I was trying to impress my then boyfriend. I mean when I was single and actively searching for my man, I cared about how I looked, how I dressed, how I walked and how I ate every bite. While there’s no excuse for us getting lazy, too often we all do.

That is what makes it such a culture shock for ladies who find themselves back in the dating world after the divorce, death or break up of a long term relationship. Thus one of the first things to focus on is your overall outward presentation to the world when you get ready to jump back into the dating world. That includes your table manners, posture, clothing, hairstyle, make-up and even the articulation of the words you speak (i.e. “yes” instead of “yea”).

Here’s a fun gift idea for yourself this holiday season—why don’t you grab a friend and sign up for a local charm school. Or maybe even a new hairstyle or clothing makeover. We all deserve a little pampering.

Another way to freshen up your charm is to people watch. Notice how obvious single women act around single men. Are they more aware of their manners and attractiveness than women you see sitting with their husbands? What else do you observe? Not all the single gals will act how you prefer to act. Some will embarrass themselves with being way too provocative which only gains them a potential one night stand and little else. But what you will notice, overall, is that they care about how they present themselves. And that is something we can all work on.

This Thanksgiving be thankful for God giving you a fresh start and have fun reinventing your charming self. You and the world around you will be blessed.

Do you Suffer the Britney Syndrome?

Cut the girl some slack. Come on now, don’t we all have a little Britney syndrome in us? My heart truly goes out to Britney Spears. Yes she’s spiraling out of control, that is clearly no secret. It’s devastating for any woman to go through a break-up. It’s exponentially harder to go through it in the pubic arena with the paparazzi capturing every moment on film. Ladies when we’ve had our heart ripped out of us we don’t always make the right choices on how to live through the pain. Unfortunately, Britney has chosen to seek revenge by partying all night, hanging with the wrong friends, adding tattoos and shaving her head. She’s become obsessed with attempting to show her ex she can live and smile without him. But you know what? She may have a pasted on a smile but she’s devastated and crying out for help on the inside.

It just breaks my heart that Britney is choosing the wrong friends to help her through. We’ve all be there, haven’t we? None of us are perfect. I remember being dumped by a boyfriend for some blonde bombshell and I ran out that next day to “show him” and cut 12 inches off my hair above my neck—and my biggest asset used to be those long locks. How dumb was that? Hello…he dumped me and I was punishing him by cutting the hair he loved. Why would he care? He already left! But that is one of those silly examples of how irrational we ladies are when we hurt.

Love Lesson: When your heart is ripped right out of your chest, feel the pain, fall on your knees, cry, pray and mourn. That is healthy to do. Then write, write and write in your journal (I write my journal to God since I know he is actually reading it as I write and cares about me even when no man gives a rip). Most important, carefully chose healthy friends to spend time with who will lift you up rather than drag you down. This is the most difficult for celebrities when trust is a precious commodity among friends, acquaintances and hanger-ons, especially when every tabloid is pursuing your friends for a story with money dangling in front of them. Here’s some reading recommendations: My favorite scriptures for getting me through heartbreak: Psalm 139 (Old Testament), Jeremiah 29:11 and the book of Proverbs and Gospel of John (4th little book of the New Testament) and Roman 5:3-5. Books: The Verbally Abusive Relationship by Patricia Evans, Seizing Your Divine Moment by Erwin Raphael McManus, Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren.