Moms....really? You let your kids watch WHAT?

Okay it's time for my rant to moms out there. Once again one of my kids friends went on and on about the rated R movie she watched with her parents and how scary it was and how she had bad dreams and hated it. For whatever reason, kids love to tell me stuff--I guess my kids let friends know what I do for a living and that I write books so they like to come talk to me.

Honestly, I so don't get how some parents--adults I enjoy talking to and seem to have it together--have this chip missing inside their brain that doesn't allow them to filter what is okay for kids and what isn't. Movies have ratings for a reason. And if it has been given an R rating, there are elements in the movie that have been deemed too harsh for young minds. By the way this rant also goes for parents allowing M-rated video games for their kids--seriously! Give me a break! Shockingly I hear about this more than I hear about the movies!

This particular child I'm referring to today was subjected to two horror films that her parents wanted to see so they turned them on cable when she and her 3 year old sibling were still up and had them watch it as a family. Both these movies are films I would not personally choose to watch because the subject matter is too disturbing for me--an adult! I asked her why she didn't just tell her Mom it was too scary. She said she did but her mom wanted to watch it.

I must say in every single incident where one of my kids friends have told me they've seen scary or risque movies in the past few years (my kids are 10 and 9 now) the kids said they were films their parents wanted to see. Thus it is quite clear that parents are thinking more of themselves than their role as a parent. I'm not judging the parents personal choice in movies THEY want to watch for them, but come on, you can watch them when your kids are asleep, in another room, or while at a friends house.

It is our job as parents to protect what goes into our children's minds during their childhood. If you have been blessed with the role as parent--then parent, don't be a "buddy" to your child. And that means protect, as best you can, what you permit your children to see. And FYI, if your kids are having recurrent nightmares, chances are they have been playing video games or watching media that is disturbing them.

Hey Moms, Get by with a Little Help from Your Friends!

I caught another episode of The-Judds, a reality series capturing the three week reunion tour of the mother-daughter country superstars of the 80s, Naomi and Wynonna Judd. Their dysfunctional relationship necessitated a therapist joining them on the road as they attempted healing as they faced their painful past. This particular episode included the release of other famous daughter Ashley Judd’s autobiography. Mama Judd Naomi was devastated to realize her lack of parenting skills caused lifelong pain to both famous daughters. What stood out to me in this episode, as they revisited Ashley and Wynonna’s childhood Los Angeles homes before fame, was that they did NOT have a support system. 

Naomi was a single mom of two young girls working 2 and 3 jobs to put food on the table and yet she had no support system. Single moms out there, in fact all women, we need support systems. The best support system I can guide you towards (outside of family when you have family of course) is to get involved with a local church--a great place to meet God and find friends to get you through a lifetime! Indeed, we get by with a little help from our friends! What better place to meet friends that at church? Churches these days have such wonderful support groups, especially in this age of mega-churches.

Here are just a few (of the MANY fabulous churches) with great support systems set up. In the Bible-belt where I live in Texas there’s my home church Gateway in Southlake (with campuses in North Richland Hills and Frisco). There’s also Fellowship Church in Grapevine, Oklahoma has Life Church in Edmond, California has Saddleback Church and so on. Wherever you are, get involved in your local church, be it large or small, and get the help and support you need.  Having recently had a death in the family, I was just amazed at how immediately my church family surrounded us and helped up put the funeral together and just be there for us. I’ve asked myself several times in my life: “What do people do who don’t have a church family in times of need?” The Judds episode tonight showed me what they do...they have a hard time. If you are out there going it alone as a mom, let me encourage you that there is support for you out there waiting to help--reach over for help from a church near you!