Ugh, My TV Broke and I Really Loved It

First off, sorry about the last blog being just a photo of me. I was trying to upload my new headshot and instead it went out as a blog. I'll figure it out soon and it will replace the old one you see here.


Here's my words for the day: Our flat screen TV broke last week while still under warranty since we’ve only had it 6 months. We really loved that TV—it fit perfectly in the wall space carved out for a large screen TV. We loved the picture and we’d invested so much to acquire it, but it just broke. So we called Best Buy and they said we can come in and just pick a replacement since they don’t carry that one anymore. Cool right? We tried one—the top rated brand at that—and it just wasn’t the same. We whined and mourned and shopped and shopped until we finally made our choice and replaced our old one.

Why am I rambling on about my TV dilemma? Thanks to several emails from Myspace friends complaining about disappointment in old and new boyfriends during the same 3 day process of looking for my new TV, I couldn’t help but compare a perfectly fitting TV to searching for a perfectly fitting man.

Have you ever caught yourself yearning for an old love and comparing him to every new one that comes along, even though he was broken and definitely not good for you? The problem with that is when time has passed from a broken relationship we forget all the bad stuff and simply idealize the fantasy of the good.

Sure your ex had good qualities or you would have never seen him in the first place, right? BUT, did his bad outweigh his good? I mean my TV was broken and not able to be fixed, I had to move on or I wouldn’t be watching TV. Was your relationship so broken that you weren’t relating anymore? Was he too different from you or did he treat you badly? Was he abusive? Did he lack the important qualities on you crave for your ideal mate? If that was so, no matter how much you liked him or how addicted you still feel to him you have to move on if you want to find true love.

Feel the hurt. Mourn, whine, even sulk. But choose a time period for that (a few days, weeks or months) then let go and continue living your life so you can be free to fully love the right guy when he appears.

It’s just not fair to compare every new guy to a fantasy (the unrealistic memory of a fallen relationship). Yes, ABSOLUTELY you need to keep to the standard of the GOOD qualities the ex had that are on your must-have list for your ideal mate!

But remember that every man, including your ex, has faults. I’m definitely not telling you to settle for less than the best. I just want you to pay attention to exactly what you are getting—the good and the bad—and determine at that point if the man in front of you right now is one to keep or one to replace. Every relationship comes as a whole package—the good, the bad and the ugly. (Hey, we’re far from perfect as well). The only person to change someone is the person himself. So don’t choose your mate because he has potential, choose him for what he is today. If your relationship is not fixable, walk away while you’re still under warranty (before the wedding). As hard as it is to say goodbye while dating, it is no comparison to splitting up after you’ve married!