The REAL hero of "It's a Wonderful Life"

I just got this email from a friend who is in the midst of devastating divorce. Wow, it made me stop and think so much I thought it was worth sharing with my readers! Have you ever stopped to ponder about who is the REAL hero of the Christmas favorite “It’s a Wonderful Life”? Here’s one man’s view…
“Hey, Victorya:

I just had a thought I needed to vent to someone. I hope you don't mind. I watched "It's a Wonderful Life" with my kids last night. I make them watch it every year. As I was watching the movie, I couldn't help notice that George Bailey is pretty cranky throughout the movie when the pressure of everything gets to him, especially when the money gets lost. My daughter even commented on it. I found myself defending George because I related very well to George and the pressure he felt. I, too, have been cranky when the pressure of my wife’s outrageous behavior and reactions to our financial hardship got to me.
I couldn't help but wonder what a different movie it would have been if Bailey’s wife, Mary, had decided she would be happier with the plastics guy and left George. Instead, she stepped up to the plate and was strong when he was weak. She rallied the troops to begin praying (what ultimately saved his life) and bailed him out by raising the money they needed. She never stopped seeing the fact that he was a good man, even when he wasn't acting that way. I couldn't help but be envious of George and the good and faithful wife that he chose. I realized, perhaps for the first time, that she was just as much the hero of the movie as he was.

Victorya, I don't know if you can use this to inspire women, but I wanted to pass the thoughts along. I hope and pray that the ideal of a Mary Bailey is not simply something movies are made of. There’s got to be more Mary Bailey’s out there?”
Your friend… a discouraged "George Bailey"


So ladies, don’t you want to be a Mary Bailey?” You know, a woman who will rally the troops to pray for your man when the going gets tough? One who steps up and is the strong one when your man is weak? And a woman who focuses on the good inside your man even when he’s so cranky you’d prefer to slap him? I pray that that is how my husband sees me and if I haven’t achieved her yet, may I in 2008!
Victorya Rogers

Back in the Dating Game after Divorce?

Perhaps the most confusing, insecure and scary time to date is right after the dust has settled on a divorce. I mean, what do you do? You've been married for so long and many of you have not been on a date in decades--yikes! What do you do? I was recently asked these very questions by MSN and Match.com. Here's the article and my answers How to Ace First Dates. Hint--hold back, don't tell him all about your horrible ex and whatever you do, don't put out!

Victorya Michaels Rogers
The Automatic 2nd Date (comes out TOMORROW, October 17

Don't Go BROKE Breaking Up

You don't have to lose EVERYTHING when you break up! You can still walk away with at least your bank account and assets if you know what you are doing. The sad reality is that most couples who break up DON'T know how to protect their money and they're too angry with each other that they just don't care at the very time in their life they REALLY need to care.

Many of you reading my blogs are in the middle of a divorce right now. Having walked alongside several friends during some very ugly divorces, what I have witnessed as the messiest side of divorce is the money lost! Lawyers get rich and you go broke. USA TODAY has a great article offering guidance to people in the exact position you are in today. Click on this link and read the entire article so you don't GO BROKE while you're breaking up!

Victorya Michaels Rogers